I can't wait to get home from vacation and find a Rabbi who will help me to convert. Do I just look in the yellow pages? I think I will go to the Jewish Center and talk to someone there. I know a little about what I'm up against (so to speak), and I am ready to begin the process.

In conservative Christianity, divorce is a completely bad thing except in only a couple of strict instances. But what I read on the Jewish website, it seemed more in line with what I feel to be right. It says, "Judaism has always accepted divorce as a fact of life, albeit an unfortunate one, and permits divorce for any reason, but discourages divorce." (there is more here). I feel so unequally yoked, that I know can't stay married. But, again, I will trust Hashem.

I do not see how it could work out between Sam and I because I see Christianity is at odds with Judaism in various ways within the very fabric of its ideas and context. What I feel is, everything that I see that is wrong with Christianity is because they haven't stuck to the original Bible and the customs of the Jews. They take things out of it's original context. This was very much talked about in the new testament, and the new books forsake the old traditions, for the most part. But, effectively, the "proof is in the pudding"-- historically and experientially--people begin to compromise too much and it effects their relationship with Hashem and with the whole community. That is what I struggle against. I have a lot to learn because I grew up with a contorted view of the Jewish customs and belief. People around me made it seem that Jews were superstitious and bickered about the meanings of their customs and laws, when really the traditions were obsolete. I don't feel that way. These customs are valuable, established by Hashem and are a cornerstone to a healthy community. It is what I feel I need, too.

I am ready to talk to my dad, tonight. And then, I will talk with Sam.

I will need to officially start my homeschool year, soon. I want to incorporate Jewish lessons in our homeschool. I searched online to see what resources were out there.

here is a page with a list of websites with which to start. I would like to connect with an actually group.